Tuesday, December 05, 2006

The conversation continues...

He writes:

look followe my simple order,you are not surpose to be familiar  wiyh my hotel address , iam wacthing uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu now

I write:

dude, your order isn't simple, all I asked for was an account number.
tell me eddie - to where should this money go.
I am emailing uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu (more u's, more powerful!) now.
be simple.  be yourself.

He writes:

look followe my simple order,you are not surpose to be familiar  wiyh my hotel address , iam wacthing uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu now, dony yake me 4 a joke

I write:

i didn't ask uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu for your hotel address joker, I asked you for something different.  did you not read my email? I don't think you did, even though it was much shorter than uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu'rs.

He writes:

i pitty  uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu  you dont  know me yet

I write:

pity has one t.  don't needs an apostrophe.  You is spelled with three different letters, not by holding down the "u" key.
Need more help?  I ask because your email to me, besides being really rambling and disjointed was filled with spelling errors, grammatical errors and the like.

He writes:

time  will tell

I write:

tell what?  I tell time, clocks tell time.  What does time tell?  Over time we might learn things. 
All of this is helping your english, which will make you better able to send more reasonable "spam" sort of stuff.
Sigh, still no accounts to transfer money.  Bummer - you could be rich by now, oh well.

This is what happens when you get bored in a hotel room I guess ;)



Blogger SeanMacGC said....


You do realise Tom, that this individual is not actually from Nigeria, he's only there on business of the occult from Kenya, which really makes all the difference :o)

Tue Dec 05, 07:01:00 AM EST  

Blogger Alberto Dell'Era said....

I think that this spammer is not after your money at all ... He's probably dying of boredom in an hotel room as well, maybe the one next to yours ;)

Tue Dec 05, 07:32:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Dan said....

I'm guessing you have a ticked off PeopleSoft customer on your hands.

Tue Dec 05, 07:52:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Tom said....

This guy's no fun....some of the others on


played along much better!

Tue Dec 05, 08:00:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Kirtan Desai said....

Check the person in the room next to yours. I bet you they are getting a kick out of this one right now!!!
This is funny though!!! I am on the quest of finding email addresses of BillG, Larry, Trump, Bush etc etc. Damn!!! that's $2000 right there!!! I am getting more and more excited.

Tue Dec 05, 08:12:00 AM EST  

Blogger orlat84 said....

Still able to see Tom? :)

Tue Dec 05, 09:35:00 AM EST  

Blogger Stewart Bryson said....

Is this why I can't ask a question on AskTom?

Sorry... just kidding. Don't send your voodoo henchman after me.

Tue Dec 05, 09:56:00 AM EST  

Blogger jan van mourik said....

Maybe we can all send orobosa54653128@yahoo.com an email and ask him to please please pretty please leave you alone because we need you to answer all our questions on asktom!

Tue Dec 05, 10:24:00 AM EST  

Blogger Sidhu said....


Even you must be enjoying answering entirely different kind of questions ;-)


Tue Dec 05, 10:37:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....

At least you know Tom reads all his emails, even if he doesn't respond.

Sir, if you don't send me your books, I will perform Voodoo on you. I am the premier chief of the burgerbarn tahiti wackme hut in the dar island of soluminjababa. Uuuuuu wil also ned to tell me how to make my database run fasterrrrr.

Tue Dec 05, 01:54:00 PM EST  

Blogger SeanMacGC said....


Is that because he's blown his previous 54653127 yahoo.com e-mail incarnations with such pathetically comical threatening posts?

Tue Dec 05, 02:40:00 PM EST  

Blogger gandolf989 said....

You can always mail him a letter with the words "IOU 500 USD". ; ) Either that or ask him send help you liberate a large sum of cash from a numbered Swiss bank account. : )

Tue Dec 05, 02:59:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Robert said....

heh I take a break friom this blog for a few days and all these "WTF ?"

Tue Dec 05, 03:42:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....

What's going on with asktom.oracle.com? I hope it's not related to this ...

Tue Dec 05, 05:58:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....

Maybe you should be cautious.. maybe he is nuts?

Tue Dec 05, 07:51:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Robert said....

Stop being such a pain-in-the-neck Tom, just give the guy something...like coupons to your next seminar,

heck I will take'em if he doesn't want

Tue Dec 05, 09:56:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Jay said....

Tom,All you have to do is to e-mail him your photo ( the one on the front cover of the first edition of expert one-on-one ). That would ward off all the "voodoo" he might have cast upon you ... and you know what, he might even start using bind variables !!!

Wed Dec 06, 07:43:00 AM EST  

Blogger Rich said....

SQL>SELECT 'I Just signed this bozo up for about 100 mail lists' as lol FROM dual;

I Just signed this bozo up for about 100 mail lists

Elapsed: 00:00:00.01

Wed Dec 06, 08:50:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....


You are the most patient person I have ever met.

Wed Dec 06, 09:36:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....

Repeat this phrase to protect yourself from all voodoo:

"Wa sagoos eyam"

Say it again.



Wed Dec 06, 10:05:00 AM EST  

Anonymous Jean-Francois Mariotti said....

Mr Tom Kyte,

Send $501 to Crédit & Secret Bancaire Suisse, account number 01688-03113 immediately. If you do not, I will fill up the file systems on your Ask Tom site!

Also, you will get the shanks and you will never be able to play on the Senior Tour again.

I hope you can still see to read this...

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu have been warned!

Fri Dec 08, 10:15:00 AM EST  

Blogger Thomas Kyte said....

gasp, my file system did fill up this morning.....


Fri Dec 08, 12:13:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....

check out
A scam uncovered.

Fri Dec 08, 10:30:00 PM EST  

Anonymous Anonymous said....

Have you gone blind yet?

Wed Dec 27, 09:54:00 AM EST  


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